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Are You Dad Tired?

Before I had children I had to think hard before I could point to the few moments in my life when I felt extremely vulnerable, uncomfortable, and inadequate. Not because I wasn't any of those things, but more because I was blind to my blindness. Fast-forward a few years to me being married with three children and it would be difficult to point to a time when I DID NOT feel vulnerable, uncomfortable, and inadequate.

You could imagine how frustrating this is to the man who is called to be the "spiritual leader" of his household. How am I supposed to lead my family well if I can't keep it together myself? Who am I to say "follow me" when it seems like the only thing I'm good at is going in circles?

Last week, I invited Jerrad Lopes of to come on the podcast and dive into this dilemma that a lot of us are in. The words from his book, "Dad Tired" sum it up best. He says;

"Don't let your sin and shame stop you from leading your family. . .They need a broken man who is being healed by a gracious God to point them back to that healing when they too fall short. You can't give what you don't have, or teach what you haven't experienced."

Those words demand a deep sigh of relief.

Breathe for a moment and soak in that truth. Again, "You can't teach what you haven't experienced." What Jerrad is pointing to is permission to be imperfect. Permission to be messy, to be human and to allow God's transformative grace to lead you as you lead your family.

Brothers, Jesus isn't asking us to pick up perfection and follow Him. He isn't asking us to get it together before we start leading our families. In fact, no matter how much our masculine bravado tries to cloud reality, Jesus is calling us to ditch the self-imposed burdens, submit to God and depend on Him!

Forget the weight of shame!

The author of Hebrews points to the weight of shame when he wrote,

“Let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith"

Run the race, do it honorably. Lead your family, do so faithfully.

Continue to march.


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